How to Develop a Disciple-Making Lifestyle

Making disciples isn’t an optional part of the Christian life; it’s a direct command from Jesus, our King, found in Matthew 28:16-20 (AMP). Discipleship is central to the Great Commission, and every believer is called to engage in this mission. The question is, how are you doing it now? How often do you actively participate in disciple-making activities?

If we aren’t making disciples, we’re falling short of the command to seek first the Kingdom of God. But don’t worry—the Holy Spirit is fully committed to helping you live out this call. Let’s explore how you can develop a lifestyle focused on disciple-making, moving beyond merely seeking converts to forming lasting, Christ-centred friendships.

Disciple-Making: More Than Just Converting

Disciple-making isn’t just about adding people to the church. It’s about fostering deep relationships that guide others closer to Christ. Converts are those who come to believe in Jesus, but true discipleship involves making friends for the Kingdom—friends who walk with you as they grow in their faith journey.

Take a moment to reflect: who are three people you want to help disciple? These could be believers or non-believers, churchgoers or not. If they’re not Christians yet, think about people in your life who might be “people of peace,” a concept from Luke 10:1-16. A person of peace is someone who, even though they may not share your faith, knows you are a Christian and still welcomes and respects you.

Write down the names of three people who come to mind. They could be neighbours, colleagues, family members, or friends.

Using the B.L.E.S.S. Framework for Disciple-Making

A helpful strategy for disciple-making is the B.L.E.S.S. framework from Everyday Ways to Love Your Neighbour and Change the World by Dave and Jon Ferguson. B.L.E.S.S. stands for Begin with Prayer, Listen, Eat Together, Serve, and Share Stories. Let’s break this down into practical steps you can implement right away.

1. Begin with Prayer

Prayer is where disciple-making begins. How self-centred or other-centred are your prayers? Are you praying for the spiritual growth of others or focusing mainly on your own needs? The Apostle Paul modelled this beautifully in Galatians 4:19: “My little children, for whom I labour in birth again until Christ is formed in you.” Pray for those you want to disciple and ask the Holy Spirit to guide your interactions.

Take time today to lift up those three people in prayer. Ask for wisdom in how to approach them and for opportunities to share Christ with them.

2. Listen (John 3:1-3)

Effective disciple-making requires you to be a good listener. Listening is more than just hearing words; it’s understanding what is being said and what is left unsaid. Create space for genuine conversations by asking open-ended questions that go beyond superficial topics like the weather.

Also, tune into what the Holy Spirit is saying during these conversations. He can give you insight into what your friend needs or how best to support them spiritually.

3. Eat Together (Luke 19:1-10)

Jesus used meals to connect with people and teach them about the Kingdom of God. Sharing a meal or coffee with someone can create a comfortable environment for deeper conversations. Who are you meeting up with for coffee, a meal, or a drink? Who should you be inviting out to build a stronger friendship and help them on their discipleship journey?

Write down the names of a few people you’d like to invite to share a meal with. These social moments can open doors for more meaningful spiritual discussions.

4. Serve (Luke 5:1-11; John 13:5-20)

Serving others is one of the most powerful ways to demonstrate Christ’s love. Ask yourself: How can I serve the people I am discipling in practical ways? Whether it’s offering help with a project, providing a listening ear, or meeting a tangible need, serving shows the love of Christ in action.

For instance, you might have a friend in need of a place to stay. Sharing your home with them, can be a real act of service and love. I once had a friend do this for me during my university days, it helped build our relationship closer and we became best of friends as we encouraged one another on our journey of knowing Christ together.

5. Share Stories

Sharing stories about how God has worked in your life can have a profound impact on those you are discipling. People connect with stories, especially when they are authentic and relatable. Whether it’s a testimony about God answering a prayer or guiding you through a challenge, these personal stories can inspire others.

Think about your everyday interactions—like talking to a taxi driver or a colleague. Share naturally about how God is shaping your life. These small, casual stories can create big shifts in someone’s understanding of faith. I recently had a great conversation with a Lithuanian taxi drive who I incidentally had a lot in common with. This opened the door to great conversations, including about my faith and my spirituality. The taxi driver asked great questions, and I shared my experience of following Jesus with her.

Invite, Share, Connect: Living the Great Commission

Discipleship isn’t just a structured program—it’s a way of life. The B.L.E.S.S. framework offers practical ways to build disciple-making into your daily interactions. But let’s also remember to invite, share, and connect with those around us.

• Invite: Invite your friends to social gatherings, spiritual meetings, and shared experiences where they can encounter the love of Christ.

• Share: Share meals, social times, and stories of your walk with God. Share both spiritual and natural resources that might help them.

• Connect: Introduce them to other disciples of Christ and connect them with your local church community. The journey of discipleship is one we walk together, as part of the Body of Christ.

Takeaway: What Will You Do Today?

Now that we’ve explored what it means to live a disciple-making lifestyle, ask yourself: What’s my key takeaway? How will you begin to incorporate these principles into your life starting today?

Repent, Believe, and Be Baptized

If you are not yet a follower of Jesus Christ, you have not yet started your journey of making disciples of Christ. The journey of making disciples of Christ begins with the journey of being a disciple of Christ and taking your own step of faith. I encourage you to respond to the gospel today by repenting, believing, and being baptized. This is the heart of the Great Commission—to see lives transformed for eternity beginning with yours.

Making disciples is a lifestyle, not a one-time event. Start where you are, with you, with the people you know, and let the Holy Spirit lead you in growing the Kingdom of God one relationship at a time.